Birth Myths Busted: Real Talk from Your Favorite CT Doula

Birth: the miraculous, wild, often messy, magical, deeply human experience that everyone seems to have an opinion about—even if they’ve never given birth, been to a birth, or read anything more than the “What to Expect” headlines.

As a Connecticut birth doula who supports all kinds of families—whether you're planning an unmedicated home birth or an epidural in the hospital—I’ve heard it all. Let’s set the record straight on a few myths.

Myth #1: “Your water will break and then you’ll immediately go into labor.”

Ah, the Hollywood fantasy: you're walking through Target and—splash—your water breaks in a dramatic tidal wave, cue dramatic music and rushed car rides.

Reality check: only about 15% of people (I actually think the percentage is closer to 10-11% locally) experience their water breaking before labor starts. Most of the time, contractions begin first, and sometimes your water doesn’t break until well into active labor—or your provider breaks it for you. Sorry, rom-com writers.

Myth #2: “You have to push on your back.”

This one really gets me.

Spoiler alert: the back-lying position became standard mostly because it was more convenient for doctors—not for the birthing person. Motion is lotion in labor and delivery so you can and should use a variety of pushing positions!

As a CT doula, I’ve helped clients push in all kinds of positions: side-lying, squatting, hands and knees, birth stool, etc. You’re not stuck in one option—and your body often knows what position it wants.

Myth #3: “Epidurals slow down labor.”

Sometimes yes. Sometimes no. Sometimes it’s exactly what someone needs to relax and let labor progress.

There’s no one-size-fits-all answer. It depends on how far along you are, baby’s position, your individual body, and a bunch of other factors. The real takeaway? Informed choice matters more than blanket rules. My job as a birth doula is to support your decisions—epidural, unmedicated, or anything in between.

Myth #4: “You won’t remember the pain.”

I call this one well-intentioned gaslighting.

Yes, some people forget the details of labor pain. Thank you, hormones. But others remember it vividly. That doesn’t mean the birth was traumatic. It just means you remember. You’re human. You did something huge. Let’s stop pretending you’re supposed to forget it to make it “count.”

Myth #5: “A healthy baby is all that matters.”

This phrase makes me want to flip a table.

Of course a healthy baby is important. But so are you. Your mental health matters. Your body matters. Your voice in the birth room matters.

As a CT postpartum doula and birth worker, I see firsthand what happens when people are dismissed, talked over, or made to feel like they should just be grateful. You deserve more than that.

Myth #6: “Doulas are just for unmedicated or home births.”

Let me say this louder for the people in the back: doulas support all kinds of births.

I've supported families through inductions, C-sections, home births, epidural births, VBACs—you name it. A doula’s job isn’t to push one kind of birth; it’s to support your kind of birth, with evidence-based information, emotional support, and yes—sometimes a perfectly timed snack or sarcastic remark ;-).

Final Thoughts

There’s so much misinformation floating around about labor and delivery. And when people are swimming in myths, it’s easy to feel unsure or afraid.

But here’s the truth:

You get to ask questions.

You get to challenge the norms.

You get to choose the kind of support and birth experience that’s right for you.

And if you're looking for a CT doula to walk beside you through it—with facts, empathy, and zero judgment—I’d love to be part of your story.

📍Serving Connecticut Families

Based in East Haddam, I offer doula services across Connecticut, including Hartford, New Haven, and surrounding areas. Whether you’re looking for birth support, postpartum care, or someone to decode all the confusing hospital jargon—I’m here to help.

Want to book a free consultation or just ask a few questions? Contact me here